wen wil my blog b a happy 1?many things occured recently.... i dun wan remember bt i guess i jus cnt 4get them. first of all my dad.... he blame me 4 nt fixing the ps3 bt.... he told me he would fix it 4 me. he picked on me alot recently..... den he say i giv him a face? hw cn i smile wen i was being picked upon? yesterday he wanted used my room's plug. he yelled at me cause i was in his way which i was jus trying 2 help out.... he told me 2 gt out n pass him the wire. i did i tried 2 smile. bt wen i pass him the wire, i see his blood shot eyes n tat wolf face.... i cnt help 2 tak off my happy mask. after tat i decided 2 go out from the house.... the phone was jus another crap excuse which works. i duno y... i jus wan get out.... go lot 1 wander abt aimlessly den go 2 the fitness corner do some dips. it is realli hard..... den wen home..... i tried 2 smile after tat... i tried hard n manage 2 pass the day.
2day was another fucked up day. parents were away 2 my great grand house. so yea peace from my dad 4 a moment. i played some games n yea did some work. wen 2 lot 1 wif my sis 4 dinner. brought her 2 play arcade........ wel i'm so stupid. y m i caring 4 my sis wen wenever i need her 2 do somethin she always tink of herself? lik my lap top i need the table i ask her if she can put her nail polish on a tray slightly higher she say wat? ma fan cause so high n wan me 2 squeeze in tat small cramp hole?wtf....hais i duno wat 2 do sia..... my whole family should i care 4 them? i was pissed off wenn out of the jap room n kick the door hard.... duno the door gt spoil mah.. went 2 my room blast the music n swtich on the air con at 8.30 or 8.20++ nt sure..... jus slightly b4 my parents come home. they come home c le.... father not hapy scold me say i on air con at 8.... i also undersatnd tat the bill is high. bt i tis is my first time.... i didnt ask much hav i? i didnt ask u all keep bying things 4 me... i jus wish 2 clear my heart, my mind.... let the music blast my sadness out.... let it all b written in my chinese essay.... i jus wanted 2 write a crap essay....... n redo it again 4 teacher.... i'm so stress out..... so sad... y is all tis happening 2 me? idk..... hav i nt been helping u all cut cost? hais.... if mum were 2 tell me earlier tat the lunch hav been bought, i wouldnt hav ask her 4 my 14 dollars. i dun even wan tak money from them wen i by dinner le.... i tried saving money in skol 2 by dinner or 2 bring my sis go out hav fun... is tis nt gd enough? idk wats more they wan... i realli duno.....ah yi, ah gu, uncles, pls by me a mask 4 my christmas.. a happy 1... i tried smiling nt putting a sad face wen i get scolded by some how my dad stil tink i am giving faces wen my face 2 me is normal... i aint frowning? mayb i should cut my face... my end of the mouth cut it wider lik the joker from batman... a bigger smile... mayb den they wil noe i nt sad even wen i sad..... pls by me a smiling mask so tat i can wear it. so tat even wen i am sad wen my dad wrongly accuse me.. i can cry inside it....
toking 2 my parents seems impossible 4 me... idk y... mayb is my childhood n my whole life nt opening up 2 them.... i tried 2 bt somehow the words nvr came out. i tried yesterday n the previous nite. i tried 2 wenever they gave me gdnite kiss bt somehow it nvr came out. wats wrong wif me? hais.... bside does toking 2 them helps? my dad promise 2 understand me more bt wenever he is obsessed wif some celebration or other events n stuff he gradually 4get his promise 2 me.... n 4 wat i tel him? all he can do is mak 2 comfort me at tat point of time by apologising n tons of explanation which moved me.... n the next day or so... things repeat... i'm tired of listening 2 lectures n empty promises...... so so tired.....
met 2 typical girls 2day.... 1 was proud n arrogant. she's rich.... she clearly flaunted infront of me saying her father hav a plantation in malaysia n a buisness.... her mum was a jap. n she say tings lik tis which is hurting.. " IN MY LIFE I NVR LIVE IN A FLAT" wel i find tat unique... its hurting wen u recieved bt den she duno anything abt me.... i pity her cause i guess her family hav no time 4 her.... n she is jus arrogant n no 1 2 guide her... she's gonna suffer in future if she remains lik tis... sad isnt it? bt the joke is wen i told her some of my art works can b sold 4 some gd money .... wel wen she heard tat, clearly she is pissed n blocked me in msn. typical.....
the next girl was rather weird.. i told her i'm evelyn friend n she gradually brush me off by saying i'm nt interested in makin friends wif evelyn or her friends den she blocked me n yea i deleted her 2...... weird dun u tink? 16 yr old being so childish.... oh ya she is also a rich kid.. r al rch kid lik tis? lucky i aint 1 of those typical ppl.... dam....
my life? 'GREAT' & "SuCk"
2day was another fucked up day. parents were away 2 my great grand house. so yea peace from my dad 4 a moment. i played some games n yea did some work. wen 2 lot 1 wif my sis 4 dinner. brought her 2 play arcade........ wel i'm so stupid. y m i caring 4 my sis wen wenever i need her 2 do somethin she always tink of herself? lik my lap top i need the table i ask her if she can put her nail polish on a tray slightly higher she say wat? ma fan cause so high n wan me 2 squeeze in tat small cramp hole?wtf....hais i duno wat 2 do sia..... my whole family should i care 4 them? i was pissed off wenn out of the jap room n kick the door hard.... duno the door gt spoil mah.. went 2 my room blast the music n swtich on the air con at 8.30 or 8.20++ nt sure..... jus slightly b4 my parents come home. they come home c le.... father not hapy scold me say i on air con at 8.... i also undersatnd tat the bill is high. bt i tis is my first time.... i didnt ask much hav i? i didnt ask u all keep bying things 4 me... i jus wish 2 clear my heart, my mind.... let the music blast my sadness out.... let it all b written in my chinese essay.... i jus wanted 2 write a crap essay....... n redo it again 4 teacher.... i'm so stress out..... so sad... y is all tis happening 2 me? idk..... hav i nt been helping u all cut cost? hais.... if mum were 2 tell me earlier tat the lunch hav been bought, i wouldnt hav ask her 4 my 14 dollars. i dun even wan tak money from them wen i by dinner le.... i tried saving money in skol 2 by dinner or 2 bring my sis go out hav fun... is tis nt gd enough? idk wats more they wan... i realli duno.....ah yi, ah gu, uncles, pls by me a mask 4 my christmas.. a happy 1... i tried smiling nt putting a sad face wen i get scolded by some how my dad stil tink i am giving faces wen my face 2 me is normal... i aint frowning? mayb i should cut my face... my end of the mouth cut it wider lik the joker from batman... a bigger smile... mayb den they wil noe i nt sad even wen i sad..... pls by me a smiling mask so tat i can wear it. so tat even wen i am sad wen my dad wrongly accuse me.. i can cry inside it....
toking 2 my parents seems impossible 4 me... idk y... mayb is my childhood n my whole life nt opening up 2 them.... i tried 2 bt somehow the words nvr came out. i tried yesterday n the previous nite. i tried 2 wenever they gave me gdnite kiss bt somehow it nvr came out. wats wrong wif me? hais.... bside does toking 2 them helps? my dad promise 2 understand me more bt wenever he is obsessed wif some celebration or other events n stuff he gradually 4get his promise 2 me.... n 4 wat i tel him? all he can do is mak 2 comfort me at tat point of time by apologising n tons of explanation which moved me.... n the next day or so... things repeat... i'm tired of listening 2 lectures n empty promises...... so so tired.....
met 2 typical girls 2day.... 1 was proud n arrogant. she's rich.... she clearly flaunted infront of me saying her father hav a plantation in malaysia n a buisness.... her mum was a jap. n she say tings lik tis which is hurting.. " IN MY LIFE I NVR LIVE IN A FLAT" wel i find tat unique... its hurting wen u recieved bt den she duno anything abt me.... i pity her cause i guess her family hav no time 4 her.... n she is jus arrogant n no 1 2 guide her... she's gonna suffer in future if she remains lik tis... sad isnt it? bt the joke is wen i told her some of my art works can b sold 4 some gd money .... wel wen she heard tat, clearly she is pissed n blocked me in msn. typical.....
the next girl was rather weird.. i told her i'm evelyn friend n she gradually brush me off by saying i'm nt interested in makin friends wif evelyn or her friends den she blocked me n yea i deleted her 2...... weird dun u tink? 16 yr old being so childish.... oh ya she is also a rich kid.. r al rch kid lik tis? lucky i aint 1 of those typical ppl.... dam....
my life? 'GREAT' & "SuCk"
posted by Bryan at
9:09 PM
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